A Week In Film: 3/8/2009-3/14/2009

The second week in my "A Week in Film" series has passed, and looking back on it I think it is safe to label it the official week of onscreen penis. Dr. Manhattan's giant-CGI-blue one, Peter Bretter's average-sized-white one, and everywhere on screen: penis, penis, penis. It was like some Bizarro World to the 1980s' gratuitous use of breasts. If you have not already guessed, two of the films I watched this week were Watchmen (2009) and Forgetting Sarah Marshall (2008), two penis-filled films of mild enjoyment. For the complete list of this week's "A Week in Film" features read on... Penis.

Watchmen (2009, Zack Snyder)

I am not going to go into a full plot synopsis or even a drawn out review. Instead, I am opting to address one or two elements of the film, some parts that I liked, and a few more that I didn't. Here we go.

SPOILER ALERT!!
Let me preface this by saying that I am a big fan of the graphic novel. And, after seeing the film I believe director Zack Snyder did about all he could for the screen translation of Watchmen. That is he succeeded in transcribing the graphic novel from the pages to the screen, which is what I believe was his intention. However, there is a fundamental problem with this approach: the screen is not the page. This is most noticeable in the dialogue. Comic book lines don't transition well into dialogue. They often come across as hammy, over the top. This was a major criticism of Snyder's previous project 300 (2006). Yet, he doesn't seem to have learned from the criticism. Or, maybe he just doesn't care. Perhaps in both instances he made the films he wanted to make. In Watchmen, however, I think a greater flaw was in the editing of the dialogue, rather than its writing. In many instances the dialogue ran on for one-too-many lines. 

Case in point (and I apologize for paraphrasing, but I have no notes on the film): After The Comedian has just attacked a crowd of citizens, Nite Owl asks him something to the tune of "What happened to us?" The Comedian responds, "The American dream, the people got it. It's me." Here, the dialogue is fine. A little hokey, but all in all, fine. But he continues, "I'm the American dream." Oh!! And you lost me. We got it. You didn't have to reiterate. What's that you say? That's just nitpicking, one line in an entire film. You want further proof? 

Example number two: Dr. Manhattan and Laurie Jupiter are on Mars. He has mentally sent her back in time to when she was a child. Laurie discovers during this flashback that The Comedian, the man who once tried to rape her mother is in fact her father. She is the product of her mother's "weakness" for The Comedian some years later. We pull back to the present. Laurie is now in tears. Dr. Manhattan looks at her. He says, "You see. The Comedian is your father." No shit Dr. Manhattan! You don't say. We just spent eight minutes in a flashback, the whole purpose of which to reveal this fact. But, we just couldn't put it together without you saying it. Are we really so stupid that we would forget a major reveal within the span of literally ten to twenty seconds. Dumb! Now I have to stop writing about these moments. They're starting to make me angry. I think it's about time I mention something positive. 

Probably the best part of the entire film was the opening montage of superhero history set to Bob Dylan's "The Times Are A-Changin'." This bit is great. The song sets the mood; the images look great and work perfectly with the song. All in all a nice bit of cinema and one of the best openings to a film I've seen in a long time. With that said, the incorporation of classic time-piece songs into the film quickly went awry. By the time Simon and Garfunkel's "The Sounds of Silence" rang out over The Comedian's funeral scene, it was all down hill.

I don't want this to sound as if I completely hated the film. There were some great little fight sequences complete with the slow-mo to sped-up transitioning photography that Snyder perfected in 300. And every scene with Rorchach was great, especially the stuff in prison. His mini speech to the other inmates in the prison: "None of you understand. I'm not locked up in her with you. You're locked up in here with me!" were just as badass as they were in the book. In the end, though, Watchmen is just a slightly better than average action film. The audience is kept at arms length. The story is interesting, the film looks great, but there is no attempt to bridge an emotional connection to any of the characters. Plus Dr. Manhattan's penis is a constant distraction. I don't think I will normally attach a rating to the films I write about in these "A Week In Film" sections, but my buddy John's rating of C+ seems to have hit the nail on the head. Not terrible, not great. Just slightly better than average. 

Forgetting Sarah Marshall 

(2008, Nicholas Stoller)

A quick summary of Forgetting Sarah Marshall: Two very attractive women, two rather unattractive men, and an overabundance of Peter Bretter's wang. Some funny instances, but easily and ironically a forgettable film. 

In Bruges 

(2008, Martin McDonagh)

What can I say about In Bruges? Well, it was not at all what the trailer marketed it to be. It was a much more solemn film. There is none of the screwball comedy that is so desperately sutured into the trailer. Instead, it is a tale of two hitmen, depressed about a botched job. To tell the truth, there is not a lot to say about this picture, except that I wouldn't recommend it. 

So that's that. Week two summarized in two words: mediocrity and PENIS!

Image Sources:

Dr. Manhattan's Unit

Watchmen

Forgetting Sarah Marshall

In Bruges